Aping the Whites

Some Chinese who kept on polishing the white apples were arrogant and snobbish. I had the misfortunate to go camping with them on an island and found out lots of things and I had never mingled with them for the rest of my life! Those Chinese in this group could not write their own names in Chinese! The others who had no Chinese surnames were using the surnames of the Whites. e.g. Skinner; Mason; or Woodford . They were asking me if China was so good, why were the Chinese running out of China? They also asked why were there no people immigrating to China? They also claimed the Occidentals were more advanced, and their average IQs was the highest on this planet! And they worshipped the only one and almighty GOD which cannot be questioned. If you question him, he will cast you in hell forever! That was what I was told! I never believed this bullshit, but I did not want to waste my time talking to them about unnecessary topic. The first thing I found out was that they did not eat the top slice and the bottom slice of the loaf of bread. They also placed the slice of the remaining bread on a board and cut off the north, south, west and east corner! And they mocked at those who did not follow them! All of them only carried a Chinese surname and their names were all WESTERN ones! None of them attained high level. The highest posts they held were ADO, chief clerk, senior hospital assistant, school headmasters, or sergeants in the police or the fighting services! The village headmen allowed these people to register their children’s birth certificates under western names! And those with western names in the birth certs claimed proudly that the western blood was running in them! The next thing I found other than about this group was that they laughed and humiliated at people who held the fork with the right hand and the spoon with the left hand. They said it was wrong! But we Chinese needed the right hand to hold the chop-sticks! And the Chinese also did not need a knife on the dinning table. They were also boasting around that all men must smoke! And they also went around inviting others to smoke. At first, I thought they were the sales men from the cigarette companies! Those companies actually offered a number of packages of cigarettes and matches every day for free distribution stick by stick. And the worst thing was they told me even doctors smoke! Another incident was that these bullshitters said the potato skins must be removed before cooking. We the village people, simply wash the potato and cook it with the skin and ate the skin too! Was the potato skin poisonous? I heard it had some food value too! Another subject they thought they were superior. They denigrated those whose toilets were constructed along the rivers. During those days, the government allowed this. Those low IQs guys thought they were superior because they had the flashing toilets at home! Those who lived in houses constructed of only leaves and cheap wood were also despised! These silly fellows really thought that houses must be constructed of concrete with timber, and the roofs must be of zinc sheets, steel sheets, or tiles. They did not know the advantages of stilt houses! The also aped the west by eating potatoes and bread, saying rice was not good for health! During the past, I only met one Asian who could not take rice. He was a polite guy and I asked him for the reason. He said it was doctor’s recommendation because he got sick if he took rice! They also scorned at those who ate banana, tapioca or yam fritters, commenting that those were fit for the pigs! But the fact was there were many poor people who depended these for foods! The leaves of sweet potatoes, yams and tapioca were also taken by many as foods, and the nutritional values of these foods were not inferior to the other foods. They could not eat a fish which was lighter than 100 grams. They said those were the dog foods! That was again learned from the Whites. These Whites never bought fish weighing less than 1 kilogram. One of their white friends bought a fish which was about 36 inches long with a diameter of about 3.5 inches. He had the fish cut to about six inches per piece and fried the fish. He came back to the fish monger to insult him by saying he was cheating because he sold a rotten fish. He wanted the money back! That fish monger was calm. He took a portion of the rotten fish with his fingers and ate the fish. It was not rotten! The rotten portion was the inner part which the heat was not strong enough to cook it! One of the guys was also boasting that when his mother was sick for many months with an unknown illness, she consulted a Taoist priest, a Buddhist monk , a Muslim preacher and a priest from a Sikh Temple. None of them could help her. At last she was recommended to visit a Christian priest and that priest cure her of her illness! From then on she took her husband, and her children to the church every Sunday and they requested to be converted to Christianity! In that church they were also taught when a none-Christian wanted to marry a Christian she or he must first be converted to the Christian faith. The same group of these boastful people also told me few months ago, they conducted a healing session on the roadside to show how they could heal and cure diseases, using their holy prayers. They claimed four people came to ask for help. After their group prayer, a totally blind man suddenly regained his sight. When they carried out the next group prayer, a hunchback suddenly straightened his upper body. After the third group prayer, a mute suddenly started to talk to them and to thank them for their assistance, and the last group prayer was for a guy on the wheelchair. He suddenly was able to stand on his own and to walk around, and he asked the prayer group to donate his wheelchair to Queen Elizabeth Hospital! Surprisingly, none of the four fellows could be contacted! They were not locals. They must be ghosts? Why did these healers not perform in the local hospitals? The next topic they bullshitted was that a Christian could not marry a non-Christian unless that person has been converted. The next topic I remember was on Traditional Chinese medicine (TCM) which had been practiced in China for over 5000 years. But they said until today, we still have no scientific basis to confirm these medicines are safe and sound. Clinical trials are expensive. Except pharmaceutical giants, who else would want to carry out the research? Moreover, why would the pharmaceutical giants want to allow TCM to compete with them? However, are all the drugs which have been clinically tested safe and effective? Have you ever heard of an illness which the Western medicine has failed but was cured with TCM? They also boasted that the Jews, whose race have the highest IQs did not trust the TCM! But then the real issue was the American were the major pharmaceutical manufactures. They needed to badmouth the TCM to market their products. Many of those herbs used in TCM can be grown in your backyard. And we cannot claim a patent for any one of these herbs. This is the reason why very little research has been carried out on those herbs. So far, I have heard of one drug used for treating coronary heart disease, had been passed by the United States Food and Drug Administration, Phase II clinical trials in 2010. For the herbs to be more effective, you need to boil them raw. The powdered forms are less effective. The side-effects for Western drugs are very common, but for the Chinese herbs it is almost unknown. TCM complements conventional treatment by building up the body resistance. It takes about a week for the body condition to improve with herbal medication. TCM focuses on the patient as a whole. For Western medicine, it is focused only on the disease. Needles inserted at specific points in the body known as meridians can unblock energy channels. The Western trained doctors have yet to accept this fact. When I said pig’s lung, fried with ginger, could cure 100 day cough, a medical doctor disagreed with me. In Asia, people use Thymus vulgaris to clean up the blocked arteries. Raw and fresh Thymus vulgaris, 300 grams, are boiled with three bowls of potable water, until only one bowl of water is left in the pot. And then cool the pot down and drink the water. It is said after taking three times, once every other day, patients confirmed the blockages were cleared. Do your own research to confirm it. The Skilled Orangutans They aped the Europeans by taking sunbath from 1300 hr to 1500 hr. At 0900 hr they took cups of coffee without milk or sugar and sat under the morning sun sipping, and reading the Straits Times not knowing that reading under the sun without a pair of dark glasses will damage the retina. It was said two hours of sunbath would increase the sexual prowess of men. Is it true? Why didn’t the medical science confirm it? Surely it would be cheaper than viagra? Is this the reason why during the cold winter months in Northern Europe young ladies take leaves and spend four weeks in sunny Singapura? Doing sunbathing, eating hot Indian curries and Chinese bak kut teh? (22 lines) Copyright © 2004 by Poh Tiong Ho Kid’s Story They danced reelingly in front of me with heads slanting, left hands shaking under their balls and right hands with a first finger pointing at the heads, in revolving motion, The bodies in wriggling movements just like the rooster does Circling the beautiful hen before jumping on her No alphabetical letters can coin the words To reproduce the sounds which must be like the noises of their male gods having intercourse with the sexy female gods. They always made fun and scorned at anything oriental You eat with chop sticks but your black brothers can eat faster than you they used fingers The chop sticks were used as drum sticks on the table The shop owner dared not stop them for these hooligans had friends working at high places and can shut down the shop any moment The most shameful thing is to carry a lie and want to force it down the throats of good people If their heaven exists They should go today It’ll be a million times more comfortable than Singapura What’re they waiting for Just climb up the tallest building and jump down A million wives will be waiting for each of them How can heaven be short of females? The one eye jack who the almighty gods cannot helped may be cured in heaven The hospitals there must be more advanced for the one arm sword man, the gods will fix him a better arm. They will suffer inferiority complex no more Each Jack has a million girl friends with countless apples freely floating at any place He just puts his hand out and say diamond, and diamond is there If he says rings, the rings are there Toilets and bathrooms no longer exist I shall be in hell forever because I’m not a believer Shall I blame Ta Pei Kong? (END) Copyright © 2004 by Poh Tiong Ho